Thursday, August 5, 2010


I've had crazy vivid dreams that I tend to remember well my whole life.  For example, last night I had 2 separate dreams.  The first one, my life was being threatened by someone who was a bully to me starting in the 3rd grade and well through high school.  He kept coming by my parents house and leaving his weapons.  I assumed these were to harm me.  And I'm not talking like guns and knifes, he went old school and had the largest baseball bat I've ever seen.  Basically, it was like a whiffle ball ball but metal.  I'm pretty positive that it could smash my head in one blow.  So, I started hiding his stuff, in the trunk of my car and I kept locking the doors over and over and over but he kept unlocking them, and for about half the dream I never saw him but I knew it was him.  Then when I tried calling 911 and being put on hold or to try again later he showed up.  He tried yelling at me telling me he wasn't there to harm me and that he was just leaving his stuff there...?  I wasn't buying it.  Then he started to chase me around my house, then my long time friend Aaron H showed up in a very bright yellow t-shirt and just simply told this bully to leave me alone.  And he did.  It was very strange because I haven't seen Aaron in a couple of weeks and before then it was years.

My second dream of the night, I was pregnant, again.  I've had a pregnant dream just about every night this week.  This one I don't remember much other than images.  I think my baby finally had a father, some guy I don't think I've ever seen before.  Tall, muscular, sandy to dark colored hair.  I remember just feeling sad in this one.  Another dream I remember well from this past week, I went to a sperm bank and chose what the father was contributing.  It was weird, it was just all spelled out on the card what kind of child I'd have.  I chose to have a boy, and his father was also a redhead.  I told my parents what I did and my mom absolutely refused to talk to me.  She seemed mad at the fact that I was having a boy instead of a girl, or that I just knew right away and chose to have a boy.  When it came time to deliver my family didn't even care enough to want to take me to the hospital.  In all my dreams I never give birth.  I did tell mom about that dream and she said that isn't how she would be at all btw.  She said she'd be estatic for me.

The pregnant dreams just symbolize that my subconscious knows something new is coming. :)  I'm not sure about the first one, I suppose I'm fearing what's coming?  I fear the unknown?  I believe you can't grow as a person if you don't go outside your comfort zone though.  So bring on the unknown!

Angie and I had a very successful Pocahontas party the other night.  We built a fort with bed sheets and watched Pocahontas and ate sour gummi worms.  Before all that we made miniature funnel cakes.

In crafting news I'm about 3 inches away from finishing my first back of sweater ever, it took me about 2 weeks.  I'll probably finish it today and then start on the front.  I might take a break and knit something small I intend on giving away at christmas time.  I think as far as tonight goes though, definitely finish the last 3 inches and then I need to make a tremendous effort in finishing up a quilt so I can get it out of my room, it's not mine but I promised to fix it and I work a couple of hours on it here and there.  The owner's dogs chew it up or something, I can repair the simple rips all the way down, but I'm pretty sure there's an entire chunk missing out of a lower corner so I'll have to get creative with that.

Time to go ingest stupid amounts of iron so I can pass the iron test and donate blood today... :)

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